Mad Dog in Cyberspace

(06/08/1999)

The qvick bqrwn fozp jumlpeed ovre teh lqpy dogz.  Thz qoikd bqrwm fox juqmed oqer t'e lzay qgos.  The quich bro2n f0x fumpeed over the lzay d0gs.  Oh! Hello!  Just practicing my typing skills.  You know, I kinda resent that sentence and its stereotypification.  You like that word?  I made it up myself!  Anyway, back to our discussion.  I'm currently undergoing extensive attention-span therapy.  Personally, I don't see the big deal.  Boring is boring and being bored simply to satisfy some social standard simply bores me to the bone.  Now that I've gotten that off my chest, what do you think about this - The quick brown dog jumped over the lazy foxes.  And when foxes get their own website we'll debate the matter...

So, the video camera is off filming a re-make of 'Lord of the Flies'  for a school project so there's no new pictures this week.  This pains me almost as much as it does you, I'm sure.  I'll try to get a picture of this new problem I have.  I'm afraid my tongue is too long for my mouth.  When I close my mouth the little pink tip of my tongue sticks out.  My people think it's adorable, but I find it to be a bit embarrassing.

For the past several days my teeth have been tingling and actually hurting very badly at times.  My people insist on feeding me this rock hard stuff they call 'puppy food' that's supposed to be good for me.  It's just too hard and it hurts my teeth.  Have you ever watched people eat Grape Nuts?  My people pour milk on them and let them soak for several minutes before they attempt to eat them, and their teeth don't even hurt.  Well, I finally went without eating for a whole day before they finally figured it out.  Amazing things, these people.  A little water and a few minutes to soak, and I can eat again.  I'm not sure what's happening with my mouth.  Some of my teeth are all loose and giggly and stuff.  I must be getting old or something...

Help me out here.  There's this word that people use that I can't find in my Doggie/People Instant Translator Pocket Dictionary.  It sounds sort of like this - "setuhl doun", but I have no clue.  They always use it in a rather stern manner right when I'm having the most fun.  Like, I watch music videos out in my doghouse all day while they're at work and when they get home I want to demonstrate the new dance steps I've learned, and they keep saying that same thing over and over.  I don't get it.

Took another trip to the vet the other day.  I think I'm almost done with this shot stuff.  I sort of teased the nurse with this 'I'm an out of control maniac dog' routine.  Then when I got back out to the waiting room and my people told me to sit, I sat so cute and just smiled at her!  What a kick!  She knew she'd been had.  I probably won't get by with that next time.  Oh, well.  It was worth it!

I'm teaching my people all sorts of tricks now.  When I sit, they give me a treat.  When I lay down they give me a treat.  When I roll over they give me a treat.  But they're a little slow in learning this new trick I'm teaching them.  They throw a ball just fine, but they don't seem to be able to find it again.  I go sit by it and they come over to it and pick it up again, but still need work on giving me the treat for finding it for them.  That will come with time, I'm sure.  It just takes a lot of patience to train some people.  They'll get it, though, I'm sure.

Until later...

Rocky!